Parabellum Pandemic Response
Do you love guns, but are frustrated that you can’t shoot the COVID-19 virus?
Does this terrifying inadequacy cause you to displace your fear into anger at the public health officials, medical professionals, and pharmaceutical researchers striving to save lives?
You will no longer need to tremble in fear of your secret impotence, because Smith & Wesson now offers hi-power nano-bullet technology you can buy to blast those blood-invaders away!
Partnering with GlaxoSmithKline, we have developed an FDA-approved self-injectable to deliver your choice of the non-microchip version of the Moderna, Pfizer, or J&J vaccine.
Each blood bullet booster comes in a gun-metal gray plastic case, complete with non-slip tactical grip!
Also available in Revolver style with synthetic pearl inlay for that classic western flair, at an additional charge.
BUT WAIT, there is more!
AK aficionados demanded antiviral accommodation and we have delivered! Smith & Wesson is now proud to offer authentic Russia-made Sputnik doses clad in our Soviet Steel collectible packaging.
Lower your receivers and make your immune system fully auto-fire!